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Are you a bored stay at home mom? Or do you feel like you’ve lost your joy in motherhood?
After becoming a stay at home mother in 2017, I found myself spending more and more time on my phone. Why?
Bored Stay at Home Mom
After much prayer and reading, I came to the conclusion that I was bored with the mundane. Yes, moms have a million and five things to do – making appointments, cleaning the house, changing diapers, play dates, cooking dinner, etc. But, as the long days at home went on, all of those things started to feel more and more mundane. There was no more weekend, just a world full of Mondays.
Being a boy mom keeps me on my toes, but even grabbing objects out of the baby’s mouth and stopping the preschooler from trying to jump off the table becomes routine. A frustrating routine that can lead to checking out mentally.
How many stay at home moms find themselves lacking a sense of accomplishment at the end of the day? Surely I’m not the only one.
So, what’s the problem? How do we move from being a bored stay at home mom to finding joy in motherhood?
Separating the Sacred from the Secular
The book, The Practice of the Presence of God was once recommended to me by my pastor. This book includes writing, letters, and dictations from a 17th-century monk, Brother Lawrence. Even though I don’t agree with all of his theology, if you want an attitude check, then this book is for you. I remember being convicted as I read about Brother Lawrence using everyday, mundane tasks to worship God.
The small tasks aren’t actually small. God uses everything for His Glory.
In her article, Experiencing Joy and Purpose as a Stay-at-Home Parent, Jodi McIsaac Martens describes the change that came about she read the book. Martens asked herself the question, “Does my household work play a significant role in my spiritual life?”  Her answer was no, and when I asked myself this question as a new stay at home mom, my answer was also, obviously, no.
She goes on to discuss the separation of the sacred and the secular. The sacred is for Sunday morning worship, sharing the good news of the Gospel, going on a mission trip, etc. The secular is everything else. Sweeping up cheerios, teaching my child how to use the potty, and folding a mountain of laundry are secular, completely separate from my sacred “quiet time.”
But should they be?
How to Enjoy Motherhood
Being a stereotypical missionary going on brave adventures to bring the Gospel to the unreached people of a remote mountain village sounds entertaining and exciting. Staying home with a 2-year-old boy sounds much less glamorous.
Is being a career missionary really exciting and glamorous? No, it involves daily sacrifice, perseverance, and testing of faith. Being a career missionary can be both dangerous and lonely. But from here, while rocking my screaming son or from the church pew as I try not to let my mind wander and think about this week’s meal plan, the grass on the other side appears fulfilling and meaningful.
If, however, we combine the sacred and the secular, like Brother Lawrence, we find ourselves serving a sovereign, almighty God in every moment. The mundane is now a sacred act of worship. That is exciting!
Is holding my son during a meltdown fun? Absolutely not, but it reminds me of the love God has poured into my broken heart. Is crying after I have my own meltdown fun? Nope, but I am reminded of God’s faithfulness and mercy in each moment. When I clean up yet another diaper blowout, I persevere and do all things to and for His glory.
In each little moment, I have the opportunity to show my sons the incredible God I serve. That is an amazing and fulfilling purpose. Christ is using this time of my life to shape my character.
Are you a bored stay at home mom?
Then, look to Jesus. Serve Him. Trust Him. Build a home that points to Him. Train your child to seek Him in everything.
Is being a mother hard? Yes, but He is worth it.
Want to go deeper? Here are some verses to read.
If you still find yourself distracted by the busy but mundane aspects of your day, be sure to check out these great resources for stay at home moms!
“Fixing My Eyes” Bible Journal
Learn how I make the most of my limited time by having a plan every time I sit to read the Bible. This free printable gives you everything you need to look to Jesus whether you have 5 minutes or 50.
Redeeming Routines
Learn how to meditate on, think deeply about the Scripture, even as you go about your daily routines. These mobile guides are perfect for the stay at home mom who wants to see the mundane as acts of worship.
I would love to hear from you! How do you find meaning and purpose as a mother? When you find yourself separating the “sacred” and the “secular,” how do you intentionally strive to worship God in all things?
“There is no more weekend, just a world full of Mondays…” When we become mothers, we give up our lives, but somehow if we abide in Christ each moment, this is exactly what God wants us to be doing.
Yes! It gives us just a small glimpse of the complete sacrifice Christ made. Abiding in Him makes everything worth it.
“The small tasks aren’t actually small.” >>> This is something that I have had to learn recently. I am also a SAHM. Picking up this thought every single day, has really broken through the dark and lonely ones. “A cheerful disposition is good for your health; gloom and doom leave you bone-tired.” Proverbs 17:22, MSG
Thanks for sharing the verse! Starting the day with the right attitude helps so much.
I am not yet a mother, but I am grateful for your honesty and vulnerability. How easy it is to become bored and struggle with finding purpose in the everyday,but I love that you said “Build a home that points to Him.” How convicting! If I am not striving to make every area of my life point to Christ, then of course it will become boring and purposeless!
No matter what our role it, we should be striving to bring Him glory. And yes, I was also so convicted when I realized that I was walking outside of this truth.
“Is being a mother hard? Yes, but He is worth it.” AMEN!! Thank you so much for sharing this with us. I don’t have any answers, but I love looking for Jesus in everyday moments.
Thanks for reading!
What a great read. I have a great quote that I hold onto and live out “Lord, into Your hands I place this day, All that I have and do and say; Oh, grant that every hour be filled with thoughts and actions You have willed” – Green
That is beautiful! What a great prayer to start each morning.
I can definitely relate. It is so easy to get lost and bored in the everyday, even when we do have so much to be thankful for, when we are in the moment that is often hard to remember.
It definitely sounds easy on paper to stay thankful in the moment, but, I agree, it can be so easy to get lost. I’m thankful for both conviction and grace!
I had a good friend once tell me that when she folds laundry she prays for the person whose clothes she is folding. I thought it was a wonderful way to connect with God in the daily routine. I agree it isn’t glamorous and I have felt the same way. I think a good hobby is important to getting outside of the daily routine and doing something you love.
I love this idea! I’ve also heard about praying for someone when wrapping gifts, but this is something great for every day!
This was a great read! I’ve been a stay at home for 16 1/2 years and I’ve found myself bored at moments. Thank you for the perspective shift!
Glad to hear I’m not the only one fighting this battle!
Being a mom is such a fulfilling assignment. I am on the other side now as a Nana to 13 kids now, but my youngest just got married this summer. So we had 41.5 years of parenting (our kids were pretty spread out). Thanks for the perspective you can give from the trenches. Keeping our focus on God is so important.
I appreciate you taking the time to read, especially as a veteran momma!
Yes! This post spoke to me. Just this past year I went through some sort of existential crisis as my life as a stay at home mom of 10 years. I felt that nobody really valued me and that everything that I did was rote and pointless. That’s a frustrating place to be. Thankfully God showed me true joy that truly had to come from Him. I feel like I’m on a mission for Him now – not just a slave to our house and kids – but a slave for Christ. I share the Gospel with my kids every chance I get (trying for everyday) and I know God is continuing to work on me. This culture we live in does not seem to value mothers and definitely not stay-at-home moms (some imply I have wasted my time/gifting/education). That goes against what God says about us – so I’m rebuking the lies. Great post!
I’m glad you found some encouragement here! As a new momma, I’m sure that I am going to constantly need these reminders to focus on Christ alone. That’s one of the reasons I started this blog!
my son is the best that’s happened to me after Jesus and my husband. I love being a mom and I love staying at home to have fun with Him. Yes, I have to admit there are days especially when finances become tight I feel a lack of accomplishment but eventually in prayer it fades away.
I’m so thankful for the power of prayer 🙂
Such an honest post. I really struggled with boredom as a young mother. I always had to have an intellectual outlet, but your point of combining the sacred and secular was something that kept me focused on what was true.
Thank you for sharing! It’s always so good to hear from someone else who has been there.
I was blessed with a year and a half home with my children and was never bored. but then again, I don’t get bored easily. Thank you for sharing this for those that do
That’s so wonderful you had that time with your children and look back on it fondly! Thanks for reading!
It is a complete state of mind and heart. We can choose to see what we are doing as a missional service in our home or we can begrudge where we are in life. Honoring God in all we do, allows us to see that we can serve him in any capacity!
This! God is also teaching me a lot about gratitude (I talk about it in my next post), being thankful no matter what I’m doing.
“Christ is using this time of my life to shape my character.” Oh, conviction. I so relate to your thoughts here, Mama. It’s hard to reconcile the everyday with eternity sometimes, but it is our good and important work. Love!
It is hard, isn’t it?! I’m thankful He gives grace to sustain me!
Motherhood shapes women and God uses it to remove all forms excesses in our lives.
http://dominikagoodness.blogspot.com.ng
So true!
Add to the boredom no friends & it’s just Boooooring. After reading this post, I will no longer separate d sacred from the secular. Thank you for sharing.
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Oh my gosh, YES! I so agree. And you know what? As soon as I started taking pride in my housework, I get SO many comments, people always say “HOW do you keep your house so clean??”
It really isnt that hard to do a 15 minute sweep before guests come over, and it really makes me feel so much better knowing I am presenting myself as a put together lady, even though on the inside I dont always feel that way, lol!
Thanks for the book recomendation!